Bikini Thinspo

I have been feeling a lot of negative feelings towards my body recently and I hate it so much. My thighs are huge and my boobs have grown larger than they have been for a few years. I cannot wait to lose more weight.
I am fasting every other day and I am trying to eat less than 800 calories on the days that I do eat, so I am still boosting my metabolism and trying to eat something so I don't lose too much too quickly.
In a few months, I am going on holiday and I intend to go swimming and sunbathe. So I need to be thinner. This is why I am restricting more.

This is Bikini thinspo....

More bonespo...

I won't stop trying to lose weight until my body is as skinny as this...

Beachspo...

I don't believe what people say when they decide that 'every body is a beach body'...
There is a reason that I don't wear a bikini on the beach and that is because there is most definitely an unwritten rule. That rule is 'don't wear a bikini on the beach unless you are skinny'...
Which is true, no one on the beach wants to see a fat woman next to a skinny one, no matter how attractive they are. For me, I choose to stay away from shorts and bikini's because I don't want people reacting that way and being disgusted at having to see my half-naked body.

This is one of my reasons for longing to lose weight - so that I can look like the people below and show off my bikini-clad body to everyone who can see when I have lost all the weight.

I am back (again) and ready to lose weight...

I have become so fat and no amount of exercise or healthy eating is helping me to lose weight.... I hate my body so much and I really need to lose weight.

I am planning on intermittent fasting from 8pm to 12pm, which is 16 hours and means that the window I have to eat in will be filled with small meals, which will always come to under 1000 calories.
As I have eaten at 9pm tonight, I will be fasting until 1pm tomorrow, but the longer I can fast - the better.

I graduate in a month and a half, but I really wanted to be 40lbs lighter than I am now and I had hoped that I would lose weight by eating healthily and being good with food. But instead, it appears as though I am going back to my old ways and eating less calories with lots more exercising. Hopefully, I can lose 40lbs quickly, as I have a new job in September and want to make a good impression on my colleagues. 

Reasons to lose weight:

- To look good in a dress (see below) - for events and my job.

- To feel more confident in myself

- To wear a bikini on the beach and not have to cover my body up with baggy clothes because I am too fat to show my body off.

I just want to be happy with my body and losing weight will definitely do that.

After a long time... Thoughts.

I have not posted in ages, because I have been going through some personal things that have prevented me from posting. I have put on like 7lbs since the last time I posted, which is so disgusting, because fasting was really starting to help me to lose weight. That is why tomorrow I am fasting all day and after that I am going to eat small lunches of crackers and fruit. My dinners will be nibbled and thrown away, because I cannot do this to myself anymore. I was looking at old photos of myself the other day and it has occurred to me that I have been this fat for most of my life and I will not stand for it. I cannot let myself get down because I have apparently 'lost' the genetic lottery. That is not how it works, if I work for it, it will happen. I have gained weight and I will hate myself forever over it, but I am going to work for this from now on!.

 I want to look like this girl, with her thigh gap and skinny arms and body. I would die for this body.

I will definitely get my collar bones, my ribs will stick out and my thin thighs.

Celeb thinspo

Taylor Swift:

T-swizzle is the first thinspo I always look to, because she is just flawless and I would give anything to have her body or her legs as well. She is someone that I aspire to be. She runs as well, which gives me hope for the type of body that I could achieve, providing I stay truly on track!

I would love to be able to wear crop tops and short skirts in the way that she does, because I cannot do that myself, but if I lost the weight to look like her - bearing in mind I am not that much shorter than her - I could be able to wear the clothes like her and look good too. 

I would give anything to look like her.

Victoria's Secret Models:

They are my weakness, I would love to look like them or even be one. 

One of my rewards when I reach my ultimate goal weight of 130lbs is to go to the VS store and by a set of lingerie or something like that. Or even something in the PINK range because I would finally be pretty enough to wear something that only the VS angels (or goddesses would wear)...

My favourite models are Karlie Kloss and Gigi Hadid, but I also love Miranda Kerr.

I cannot wait to look this good!

Stay strong, skinny and lovely! 

xx